Pay Attention to This Christmas

Attention Christmas Pay

Posted August 28, 2023 by: Admin #Humor


We kindly inform all individuals intending to embark on a joyful ride in a one-horse open sleigh across snowy landscapes, with laughter filling the air, that a Risk Assessment is mandatory. This assessment must assess the safety of open sleighs and consider whether using only one horse is appropriate, especially when there are multiple passengers. Additionally, written consent from landowners is required before entering their fields.

To ensure a harmonious atmosphere during celebrations, we ask that laughter remains moderate, avoiding loud noises that could disturb others.

For shepherds responsible for watching over their flocks at night, we now offer benches, stools, and orthopedic chairs. While a shepherd observation hut equipped with CCTV cameras for remote flock monitoring is available, all users must submit an emergency response plan to address potential flock-related risks.


The angel of the Lord is reminded to ensure that shepherds wear appropriate Personal Protective Equipment before radiating their glory to safeguard against UVA, UVB, and its overwhelming effects.

In light of a previous incident, it’s important to note that discussing the color of Mr. R. Reindeer is prohibited under EC legislation. Excluding Mr. R. Reindeer from reindeer games will be considered discriminatory and can lead to disciplinary action.

While gift-giving is a global tradition, all individuals are reminded that presenting gifts must adhere to Hospitality Guidelines and necessitates registration, even for royal figures. Notably, providing direct currency or gold gifts violates the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act.


Furthermore, caution is advised when offering common gifts like aromatic resins that might trigger allergic reactions.

Lastly, in response to a recent case involving an infant discovered in a manger without a crib, Social Services have been notified and will arrive soon.

Your adherence to these guidelines will ensure a fully festive and compliant celebration.


The Mechanic’s Lesson: A Tale of Engine Expertise

While working to remove a cylinder head from a Harley motorcycle’s engine, a mechanic noticed a familiar face in his shop—it was a heart surgeon.

The heart surgeon had visited the shop while waiting for the service manager to check his bike. At that moment, the mechanic called out to the surgeon, “Hey, Doc, can I ask you something?”

Surprised, the surgeon walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle. The mechanic stood up, wiped his hands on a rag, and inquired, “So, Doc, take a look at this engine. I open up its heart, take out and fix the valves, put them back in, and once I’m done, it runs perfectly again. So why am I paid so little while you earn so much, even though we’re doing similar kinds of work?”


The surgeon paused, grinned, leaned in, and quietly told the mechanic,

“Try doing it with the engine running.”



Thanks for your SHARES!

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